Only Love (The Atonement Duet Book 2) Read online

  She gasped and writhed beneath him, crying out his name, and as her whole sex began to vibrate, he knew he had made her orgasm with little effort on his part. He hadn’t even slid any fingers inside of her and she probably had no idea where her G-spot was, let alone how much pleasure it could give to her.

  He decided she could find all of that out later when she tackled him and they switched positions. He was now on the bottom and she was on the top. She ripped open his black silk shirt, buttons popped and flew everywhere.

  Cassie tongued his nipples quickly and greedily, then her mouth began to travel lower. She couldn’t undo the button on his jeans nor tear down his zipper fast enough before she reached inside and caressed his cock. He was “hard as Japanese arithmetic”, one of Drew’s favorite sayings only because he’d spent a year as a junior high exchange student in Japan and knew what their workload was like. The saying stuck and he found himself laughing quietly about where the statement had come from and why he had thought about it at that moment.

  While Cassie wasn’t Deirdre and had none of her finesse when it came to taking his manhood in her mouth, she tried to do an adequate job and he supposed he should thank her for her efforts. She ran her tongue along the underside of his cock then slipped the mushroom head into her mouth and began to move down slowly. She couldn’t get more than half of his length in her mouth and his most sensitive parts kept hitting her back teeth. She pumped the part of his cock she couldn’t fit with eager hands until he stopped her and flipped her onto her back.

  Colin reached down and kissed her thoroughly then whispered in her ear, “Get on your stomach, baby, with that beautiful ass of yours in the air.”

  Cassie turned over reluctantly and posed for him in perfect position on all fours. From the back, she vaguely reminded him of Deirdre, which would make his orgasm that much more intense if he thought about making love to his former fiancée than her.

  He was cruel, unnecessarily so, but the moment he thrust himself into her slippery depths, he began to fuck her mercilessly and without regard to whether she enjoyed herself or not.

  College girls, he thought to himself. Do they even know where their Kegel muscles are or what they are for?

  Although Cassie had prided herself for not sleeping around, she was still loose and he had to scissor her legs together just to get any friction. The sex was not satisfying and at this point, all he wanted to do was get off so he could send her on her way and go to sleep.

  He turned her over and looked into her large brown eyes while he held her legs together and thrust his cock back inside her. He closed his eyes and thought about Deirdre. Her gorgeous eyes and her beautiful body, her tight, moist cunt surrounding his cock, milking the orgasm out of him as if her life depended upon it. And just like that, he felt the semen build up from his balls and he pulled out of her and came on her stomach.

  Dumb ass that he was, he’d forgotten to wear a condom. There was no excuse on his part because he had drawer full of rubbers right next to his bed.

  Pissed and angry at himself, he stood, walked to his bathroom, and started the shower. Before he climbed in, he grabbed a hand towel and took it back to Cassie.

  “Sorry about that. Listen, I have an early morning and you have work, so I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?”

  The disappointment settled in her brown eyes. “You don’t want me to sleep over?”

  “No, I don’t. That wouldn’t be a good idea and I’ve always been a bit selfish about my bed. Half the time, Deirdre would find herself on the floor in the middle of the night.”

  Okay, that was an outright lie and taken from a scene he vaguely remembered on Sex & the City between Carrie and Mr. Big, but it did the trick because Cassie hopped out of bed as soon as she wiped his semen off her stomach.

  “See you tomorrow,” she said, kissing him quickly on the lips and left his bedroom.

  He listened to her getting dressed and not until the front door slammed did he breathe a sigh of relief.

  Colin thanked his lucky stars it had been his idea for them to meet at his house so she could just go out to her car and leave after their sexual activities were completed for the evening.

  Alone at last.

  Yes, he’d gotten laid, but it was lousy and he realized with a dawning realization that no one was going to be able to take Deirdre’s place.

  Not even temporarily.

  Chapter Eleven

  I awoke in Drake’s bed. We both had night clothing on. It was pretty silly actually but we’d gone to sleep while watching our second sappy romantic drama for the night, The Notebook. The first had been The Prince of Tides. We discovered at the restaurant we both loved the film starring Nick Nolte which had been directed by Barbara Streisand, who co-starred. Drake had the film on Blu-ray and had invited me over to watch it. Dinner the previous night had been a revelation, mostly because it’d shown Drake to be a total gentleman. We drank and conversed like we were old pals, which frightened me in a way because I expected there to be at least a few awkward moments. He knew about my engagement to Colin, the miscarriage, and ultimately why I fled though I had left the most important part out of the conversation.

  I’d merely told him I was still getting over the death of my father and it had been a rough year for me. What he didn’t know was Liam and Colin had been directly responsible. His reaction to the incident itself had been enough for me to know that if I told him the truth, Colin would never keep his pretty boy looks. He would ruin them in a heartbeat, and that kind of possessiveness unsettled me.

  What was I doing? The man was perfect and we would make a great partner, but could I really trust him? He had connections to the Ukrainian mob for God’s sake, and although he was a chef, he was one of the most chased after bachelors in La Jolla. He was a player, plain and simple.

  He had convinced me there had been no one special since he ended his relationship with Mikayla and according to him, the only two women who had ever touched his heart had been his former girlfriend and Gisele, the elusive French beauty who had gotten away. However, that didn’t mean he’d kept his cock in cotton wool all this time and I was sure there were more than a few women in town who could attest to his sexual prowess.

  I slipped out of bed and walked to his luxurious bathroom where I urinated, used the spare toothbrush he had put out for me to brush my teeth, and turned on the shower.

  “Where are your keys? I will walk over to your apartment and get you something to wear,” Drake called through the closed double doors.

  “They’re in my handbag on the sofa in the living room. A pair of jeans and a short sleeved top should suffice!” I shouted through the door.

  “Not where I plan on taking you today, sweetie. It’s a surprise, so it’s best if you wear something a bit more conservative. How about a dress and a pair of high heels?”

  “That should work as long as we won’t be walking in the sand.”

  “I promise you that is not going to happen.”

  The water had begun to steam and I turned on the vent to get rid of the excess moisture that was beginning to gather in the bathroom. Where exactly could he be taking me? I hadn’t been to work in almost a week, and though Colin was handling it all, surely he worried about me and what I was doing?

  It never occurred to me that he might be having a good time himself. He was a man, after all, and men didn’t let their motors idle no matter how heartbroken they were, so why did I have a hard time believing Colin would be any different? Surely he’d found someone to pass the time with. Though I had no right to be jealous, the claws of envy wrapped themselves around my heart and squeezed until I could barely breathe.

  It wasn’t fair, goddamn it, and if he was in Seattle where he should have been, I wouldn’t have given his love life a second thought. The mere idea, let alone the mental image, of him going down on another woman, romancing her, made me want to gag because he was still mine and no matter what happened, I’d left him. He owed me, not to mention he should have wante
d to stay true to me if he wanted us to give our relationship another chance. However, if I found out he’d strayed during such a distinctive period in our relationship, I didn’t know if I would be able to trust him again.

  How had I trusted him at all, knowing what I knew? He and his brother had run over my father on the eve of Thanksgiving and never had bothered to report the incident to the police because they were wealthy and entitled and neither wanted to serve any time. Meanwhile, my father’s death continued to be an unsolved mystery while I knew the truth and my mother was slowly falling apart and would never be the same again.

  My decision not to go to the police and tell them the truth was twofold. Although a part of me hated Colin with a passion, another part of me still loved him with a deep and overwhelming need that made me feel incomplete now we were no longer together. And my sister was dating Liam and she had no idea of the truth. How could I shatter her world and the first man she loved so deeply in the name of justice?

  If I ever decided to go to the police to have them re-open the crime since there wasn’t a statute of limitations on murder, it would have to be with Caitlyn by my side and she would have to be willing to lose the man she’d fallen in love with.

  I knew her well enough to know that would never happen because she’d rather die than see Liam spend one day in prison for a crime he and his brother had committed while high on Bath Salts. It was completely unfair to everyone involved, most notably our poor mother who suffered day in and day. Still, my hands were tied and there was no right decision in a situation like the one in which I found myself entangled at the moment.

  It completely consumed my life. I had thought of every idea to go through with it and report them, yet I never managed to build the courage to go through with it.

  I stepped out of the shower and dried off, quickly dried my hair, and placed it in a chignon while it was still wet. I couldn’t find a hair dryer and I doubted Drake had one. I walked into his bedroom and observed two choices facing me. One was an expensive Dolce and Gabbana rose-printed bustier dress which skimmed my curves, and the other was a Jason Wu one strap, grosgrain floral printed dress. They were both earth-toned with lots of natural greens and creams throughout.

  Drake had chosen a couple pairs of high heeled sandals including a cream pair of Jimmy Choo platform sandals that looked a lot less flimsy than they truly were and a pale green pair of Prada peep-toe sandals with a four and a half inch heel to match.

  I immediately chose the Prada peep-toes because I had worn them before for hours at a time and they were very comfortable.

  My mind had drifted off and I’d been so focused on what I was going to wear I didn’t notice Drake was right behind me. His hard body was pressed against mine and it was with sheer relief I realized he didn’t have an erection. That would have been an awkward situation.

  “I’m going to shower,” he said. “I can’t wait to see you in either one of those dresses.”

  I stepped back a bit and turned around. “You still haven’t told me where we’re going and I should say this up front: I’m not particularly good with surprises.”

  He took my hands and held them in his own, palms up, and kissed my right hand. “Ensenada. It’s in Baja California and it’s beautiful. You’re going to love it there.”

  “Wait a minute…how far away is this place?”

  “It’s only one hundred miles and it’s a beautiful city by the beach. There are places to walk and shop and I want to treat you to every place I know about that has been special to me. I really love the city and you will too.”

  I smiled. “I have no doubt. Why didn’t you just tell me that? I know how much you adore pulling surprises on me but you have treated me like an absolute princess. I keep waiting for reality to crash in.”

  “What do you mean?” He sounded genuinely perplexed.

  “Well, you’re a top chef at a really expensive restaurant. Are you under the illusion you aren’t missed? I have Ground Beans and I haven’t been to work in a while. Surely we can’t live our lives like we are perpetually on vacation.”

  Drake leaned forward and kissed my lips. It was gentle yet memorable and although there was no tongue involved, every part of my body below the waist went into a frenzy of nerves. My sex ached for his touch if it felt anything like his gentle hands. “I have to go back to work tomorrow night. I expect you to at least drop in and say hello,” Drake said. “In terms of Ground Beans, I’m hoping you wouldn’t worry so much since you have Colin and he knows what you have been through. You need to get some rest and spend this week recuperating. You can go back to work on Monday and discover you haven’t missed much of anything at all.”

  Drake was right of course. I co-owned a coffee shop with my former fiancé. It wasn’t like we owned some major corporation or anything. And speaking of corporations, Colin had co-owned one of those too since he was one of the founding owners of uConnect before he pulled out and sold his shares to his brother. I had no doubt in my mind he could hold everything together at Ground Beans until I went back to work.

  “You’re right,” I said. “I’m just being silly for worrying about everything especially when I have help. Go take your shower. You have me all excited about going to Ensenada now.”

  His face close to mine, as he grabbed my hands and pushed our bodies together. “Excited, huh? Over a port ship city in Mexico? Wait until I really show you a good time.”

  I looked away from his intense gaze. My heart pounded in my chest with an intensity I hadn’t felt in a while and I thought for a moment he would kiss me. I didn’t need our lips to touch but perhaps it would soothe the ache building between my legs.

  Instead, he suddenly let me go and quietly walked to the bathroom, closing the door behind him.

  I forced a breath I didn’t realize I was and sighed with relief. That was a bit too close for comfort and I found myself dismayed that I was falling for yet another man when I had only ended an intense relationship a month previously.

  What the hell was going on with me? Was I trying to make up for lost time and all the affairs I should have had during my early twenties? It was confusing to me because weren’t emotions supposed to be simple and less complex?

  I wasn’t in love, I knew that much, but all this lust and attraction for another while I was still mourning the loss between Colin and I was starting to become too much. I needed to take it down a notch and stop acting like a foolish little college girl who’d only been on a handful of dates. I was a full grown woman and I needed to start acting like one.

  I decided then and there I wouldn’t chase after Drake no matter how tempting he made himself to me. If he wanted me, he would have to come and get me.

  ***

  Ensenada was a revelation unto itself. A tourist destination, it was located less than two hours by car from La Jolla but from the time we crossed the border into Mexico, and specifically, Baja California, there was no doubt we were no longer in the States. From the easy Spanish we heard as we walked around, to the myriad of activities we could partake in, to the plethora of restaurants we could dine in, the place was absolutely amazing.

  I didn’t feel overdressed at all because Drake had decided to go all Abercrombie and Fitch on me with his choice of clothing. He wore a pair of tan silk slacks and a white silk shirt courtesy of Armani, with a pair of tan Prada loafers which made him resemble the preppy guy he truly was under his bad boy persona. He could dress himself down and slap on a couple of tats but it didn’t change who he was: a gentleman from an old American family who had been around wealth and privilege his whole life. In fact, his new persona in Ensenada fit him a lot better than the easygoing chef he tried to perfect. There was no denying who he truly was. No matter how far he ran, he couldn’t escape the real him and we both knew it.

  We looked like the perfect wealthy couple, though I wondered why it was necessary for us to appear so distinguished if this was a casual day outing. He hadn’t bothered to take his Hummer and surprised me whe
n he pulled a black Mercedes two-seater, hardtop convertible out of his garage.

  “Um, where did this car come from?” I’d asked when he pulled up in front of the condo.

  I’d decided to change handbags at the last minute, opting for a simple yet sleek cream Chanel clutch purse instead of the usual Louis Vuitton bucket bags I preferred.

  “I have two vehicles, and in Mexico, you can never be too careful. It’s better if we look like we are extremely wealthy. They usually go for the tourists they think won’t be missed. With all the violence the country has seen recently, you never know when something could happen,” he’d explained casually.

  Everything Drake had said to me on the way up disappeared as soon as we reached the enchanted city and I looked around at the cerulean sky, the tourists, and the hive of activity.

  “So what do you plan to do with me today?” I asked as we walked along a busy stretch of the coastal boulevard.

  The Pacific Ocean was miraculously clear and calm and there were several large boats docked at the port.

  “There is so much to do and see here I thought I would leave it up to you. They have wonderful historical sights and there is the wine country located not too far away. First I want to show you something that will take your breath away.”

  I walked along, hand in hand with Drake, secretly glad I’d worn my most comfortable high heels. There was so much to take in and see, I didn’t realize we were going back toward the car.

  “We can’t walk there?” I asked as he unlocked the doors with the remote and opened the door for me.

  “Nope. I have to drive us there. Trust me, it will be worth it. Then we’ll come back to the city and have a late lunch.”

  I hadn’t realized it’d been a while since we’d eaten breakfast until he brought it up. We’d awoken at around seven and eaten a half hour later. Drake had made the most delicious egg white omelets with chorizo, cheese, and tomatoes accompanied by coffee and freshly squeezed orange juice.